Week In Review

Since my favorite section of the lovely (and highly missed!) New York Times is “The Week in Review”, I thought I could make an adaptation and squeeze it into my highly popular blog that I sure is on par with the number of subscribers the Times gets from GoBush, Wyoming. So taking a break from arguing about who really deserves the peace prize or our pathetic headway on the health care front, lets look for a moment at what important news didn't quite make in the NYT version:

Sports Debrief

Me: 0.5*

Croissant au Beurre: 786

*half point awarded for pathetic/minimal effort

Monmartre Wine Festival

Hookers and hipsters congregate together to drink booze, eat tariflette, and scare away German tourists.

Another Fine Mess: Golden Bikinis Not Allowed at Parisian Public Swimming Pools

Girl is told she must wear appropriate swimwear for first time since her mother was allowed to brush her blond bowl-cut.

Economy 101: Euro vs. Dolla

Quick Lesson: If Bikram Yoga is 25 Euros this roughly translates to $36.25. Alternative, I'm a poor teacher-friendly sport: Running. Not only can one run for free , but one may also get a free comedy routine that features American girl, first running while singing, and then falling while shrieking in the middle of a cobblestone street. I smell a Tony folks!

hint: American Girl shreiking/falling=me

Style: Dining & Wine

Spotted: Three Paris roommates, speaking broken French and English, laughing and stumbling out of a midnight dinner bonding over possible male conquests and plans for an American Thanksgiving...all topics that unfailingly transcend the language barrier,especially after a tapped bottled of delicious French wine. (Side note: If every restaurant comes with a personal, tall, handsome, bi-lingual restaurant proprietor to assist in the handpicking of wines in the "cave"....well then, I'm never coming home. But only if the next one isn't married.)

Quotation of the Week

Excerpt taken from a fellow assistant's blog, referring to none other than yours truly:

“Again the Tall One, a fellow English assistant, makes about as much sense as a three year old German child, learning French as a third language.”*

*Actual words may vary and may have been altered in transition form “copy” to “paste”. One thing remains true: I am actually referred to as “the tall one” in true life blog.

Mental Health: Crazed Woman Looking for Company on the Subway

chosen awkward bystander=moi

Technology

French keyboards insist that one must shift to type a period, but not an exclamation point. The origin of their passion explained.

Classifieds

20 something year old in search of older woman, preferably in her seventies, preferably French, to spend afternoons and/or mornings with at cafes, reminiscing about life in wartimes, and keeping her inner golden girl humored.

Status: FOUND

(same story, different city)

The Arts in Review

Deal in the art world: Watch Stephanie Stein dance on the metro. At the Bus Stop. On school grounds. Whether you are looking for Comedy or Ultra Modern Dance-ish-ness, you only have to splurge on the ticket to Paris, France!

Sponsor: www. kayak.com

Well guys, that's pretty much sums up my week. Its lightly raining and I'm about to grab a cafe and find an electric blanket so I can burn myself to pieces. Just kidding mom, Ill stick to real fiiiire. Don't you worry bout a thang.

Speaking of thangs and chicken wangs:

Update: No chicken with attached appendages in the frigo this week. Just a lot of yogurt.